How many of the five points below apply to you?
They are all positive; the more apply to you, the better.
Below, you will find an explanation of each.
Five signs you are good at giving feedback
People proactively ask you for your feedback
You avoid “fixed structures” (e.g., sandwiching a negative piece of feedback between two positive ones)
In general, you give more positive than negative feedback
Before giving negative feedback, you generally ask why people did it the way they did
After providing negative feedback, you ask the recipient whether it makes sense
The five signs, explained
1. People proactively ask you for your feedback
On the one hand, obviously, if you are good at giving feedback, people will ask you for more.
On the other hand, how many people think they are good at giving feedback yet don’t get asked for more feedback proactively? This would be a sign that, perhaps, they aren’t that good at providing feedback.
(Wait – couldn’t it be that people ask for feedback from those who only give positive one? It’s not really the case, at least not in companies. People are glad when their reviewer turns out to be soft-hearted but don’t proactively ask them for feedback. Instead, people whose feedback is sought after tend to be fair reviewers – giving a balance of positive and negative feedback, both in a helpful way.)
2. You avoid “fixed structures” (e.g., sandwiching a negative piece of feedback between two positive ones)
Poor managers use “fixed structures” to give feedback – for example, “sandwiching” a piece of negative feedback between two pieces of positive ones. Not only does it not sound genuine, but it also causes their subordinates to ignore the first positive, bracing for the inevitable negative that follows.
Instead, good managers give feedback as it comes. They see something good, they point it out. They see something bad, they point it out. No structure, only genuine helpfulness.
3. In general, you give more positive than negative feedback
Managers who are good at providing feedback usually give a ratio of positives-to-negatives ranging from 1:1 to 2:1.
Moreover, they do so by avoiding fixed structures. It’s not that they aim to achieve the 2:1 positives-to-negatives ratio and desperately invent positives to praise for political correctness’ sake. Instead, they gain the 2:1 ratio just because they look for both the good and the bad (and because they train and coach their people, thus increasing their skills).
This doesn’t mean that pointing out more negatives than positives is inherently wrong, nor that you should do it if warranted. Instead, it means that if you consistently point out more negatives than positives, you’re probably missing a lot of good behaviors to reinforce (a necessary task if you seek sustained high performance and engagement).
4. Before giving negative feedback, you generally ask why people did it the way they did
Often, there’s a reason why someone did what they did the way they did. And unless you surface and address that reason, your feedback won’t be taken action upon.
5. After giving negative feedback, you ask the recipient whether it makes sense
You might have given feedback that you thought was useful and actionable, but either your recipient didn’t understand it, or you didn’t understand the recipient’s context.
Either way, you can prevent this problem by asking the recipient whether your feedback makes sense.
That was it. How many of the five points apply to you?
This article is the third of a six-part series of self-assessments on people-management habits. Here are parts 1 and 2. Subscribe to this newsletter to receive the rest over the following days.